4 Lessons Every Parent Can Teach at Home

Leadership isn’t learned in a classroom—it’s learned on the football field, and more often, in the quiet, everyday moments of parenting.

When my son was eight years old, I made a decision on a youth football field that would shape both our futures. I didn’t know it then, but those early conversations about losing, quitting, and character would become the foundation for everything that followed—his high school achievements, college success, and the leader he is today. Sometimes the most important coaching happens not on the field, but at home, in the moments that matter most.

My son didn’t discover leadership from winning games. He learned it in the sting of losing, in the temptation to quit, in the discipline of finishing, and eventually in the steady grace of winning well. And now, looking back, I see that leadership—like spiritual maturity—is something you grow into over time. It’s forged in the “in-between,” where you are tested and tried.

Lesson One: Learning to Lose Well 🏈

I’ve always had a competitive spirit, but only in the areas I care about. My son was the same. From an early age, he hated to lose. Whether at a board game or on the basketball court, if the outcome didn’t go his way, pouting and anger would surface. His coaches saw the same thing: leadership potential wrapped in immaturity.

Everyone loses. Leaders are defined by how they respond.

Lesson Two: Learning Not to Quit 🏈

Another lesson came when my son briefly played football in elementary school. Everyone assumed he would excel because of his speed and athletic build. But he didn’t like being tackled—he just wanted to run. After a few practices, he asked if he could quit.

Here’s what I told him: ⚡ “This will be the first and last thing you quit. From now on, when you start something, you will finish it. You’ll follow it through to the end of the season.”

That agreement carried him through high school, college, and beyond. He learned that commitment is greater than convenience.

Commitment shapes character.

“Let us not grow weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” (Galatians 6:9)

 

Lesson Three: Learning How to Win 🏈

If losing tests humility and quitting teaches perseverance, then winning tests grace.

I had to learn the same lesson in my own way. For me, it wasn’t sports—it was pageants. Yes, crowns and titles mattered, but the most meaningful recognition was Miss Congeniality—a reminder that even in competition, grace and kindness stand out.

Winning well isn’t about pride or boasting. It’s about gratitude. It’s about celebrating your achievement without belittling others.

“God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” (James 4:6)

 

It isn’t just a “winning attitude” that carries us through every season of life—it’s a grace-filled attitude that honors God and uplifts others.

Lesson Four: Learning to Follow Well 🏈

Here’s the paradox: to lead well, you must first learn how to follow well.

In my Master of Arts in Leadership studies, I learned that the strongest leaders are often the best followers. Servant leadership begins with humility, and follower leadership teaches obedience, respect, and trust.

Moses modeled this. Before he could lead Israel, he had to follow God in the wilderness. And Joshua, before he could lead the people into the Promised Land, first had to follow Moses.

For my son—and for all of us—leadership must begin with following the Lord God. Because the one who cannot follow His voice faithfully cannot lead His people faithfully.

A Full-Circle Moment

Looking back now, I see the fruit of these lessons. My son not only started and finished everything in college, but he also went on to complete his master’s degree. Today, as a husband and father, he serves as a Director of Leadership for a faith-based nonprofit in Omaha, NE—a role he loves. He doesn’t just lead—he teaches others to lead.

The boy who once pouted at losing and wanted to quit is now a man guiding others through the very lessons he once lived.

The Takeaway

So, are leaders born or made? The truth is both. But leadership—like spiritual maturity—is always shaped in the “in-between.”

• Lose with humility.

• Finish with perseverance.

• Win with grace.

• Follow with faith.

Because the finish line is where discipline and destiny meet.

Now, what does this mean for you?

For the Parents in the Stands

Whether your child is on the field, the court, the stage, or in the classroom, remember this: you are your child’s first teacher—and their most consistent coach.

It’s not just about the trophies or achievements. It’s about what you model and reinforce when they face wins, losses, and everything in between.

Watch how they respond to pressure, how they treat teammates, and how they recover from disappointment. Each moment—whether they win graciously or lose with humility—becomes a seed of leadership that you help cultivate.

Your consistency becomes their root system. The conversations after a tough game, the encouragement after a hard day, and even the discipline after a poor choice all shape their character far more than any scoreboard can.

They won’t always get it right. None of us do. But when we take time to talk through the lessons—not just the results—we plant something eternal: wisdom, empathy, and resilience.

💜 A’s Love Actions:

Choose one of these four lessons and practice it this week—in your parenting, your workplace, or your walk with God. Write it down, share it with someone, and let it shape how you lead.

Your Turn

Every parent has “in-between” moments—those ordinary times when extraordinary character is built. Maybe it’s a conversation in the car after a disappointing game, a discussion about homework when they want to give up, or teaching them to celebrate others’ victories.

I’d love to hear from you.

• Which of these lessons—losing, finishing, winning, or following—has God been teaching you or your children lately?

• What “in-between” moments have shaped leadership in your family?

• How have you seen early lessons bear fruit in your children’s lives?

Share your story in the comments below. Your experience might be exactly what another parent needs to hear today.

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